Sometimes it seems like God has forgotten. Like He brought me this far, and then just left. I can look at my past and see the path He’s carried me through. I see victory after victory. I see how He held me when I stumbled. How He encouraged me when I doubted.
But I still wonder where He went today.
I am prone to fear. When I am not immediately aware of His presence, I panic and worry that my future has suddenly become bleak.
I forget that this is sometimes how He works.
“The LORD your God will clear away these nations before you little by little; you will not be able to put an end to them quickly, for the wild beasts would grow too numerous for you. But the LORD your God will deliver them before you, and will throw them into great confusion until they are destroyed.” —Deuteronomy 7:22-23
“The LORD your God will clear away these nations before you.” That’s a promise. From God. He always has and always will keep His promises. I will eventually arrive at the goal that He has placed before me.
“Little by little.” God is not in the same hurry that I am. He already knows the future. He already knows where I will end up. He is willing to take His time in getting me there so that I will be prepared to face what will be there when I arrive.
“The wild beasts would grow too numerous for you.” Like the Israelites, if the progress is too quick, I will be vulnerable to attack from all sides. God, in His wisdom, moves at a pace that allows me to grow into the space I occupy before He leads me forward.
“But the LORD your God will deliver.” This promise is important enough to be repeated. God reminds me repeatedly that my trust in Him is never in vain. He knows my tendency to wander into doubt. So He places reminders in my path to keep me focused on Him in the midst of my questions.
I am reminded that there is purpose behind every action. And every pause.
It’s during the pauses that He is preparing me. Growing me. Strengthening me. So that I am not overwhelmed by the next step along the way.
I know in my heart that He will complete what He started.
I know in my heart that He hasn’t abandoned me.
I need to convince my head that His plan hasn’t changed.
That the work He’s doing now is teaching me to trust Him. Even when I can’t find Him.