A Prayer From the Wilderness

Note

There are seasons in life when the path ahead disappears and the future becomes uncertain. Scripture often describes those seasons as wilderness.

In January 2026, While waiting for my legal case to reach court, I found myself in one of those places. One evening I sat down with Philippians 4:6–7 and tried to do exactly what Paul instructs: bring everything to God in prayer.

This is the prayer that came out of that moment.

My Prayer

“Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” —Philippians 4:6–7

Legal

Father, I don’t want to go to prison, or even back to jail. I know it is within Your power to keep me from that result. My prayer is that my case will be resolved in such a way that incarceration and registry are not required. As I make this prayer, I am aware that it is ultimately selfish and short-sighted.

I have prayed for and envision myself teaching broken men about Your healing touch. I dream of possibly planting a different kind of church — one that mirrors the New Testament church. I long to be a part of a church family that is working together to make a lasting difference in the community. I want to live a life that reflects Your glory and points people toward You.

But I can accomplish all of those goals behind bars just as easily as outside of them. In fact, I fear that on the outside, I will lose my focus and drift back into an “easy” faith that few ever see.

Plus, I am reminded of Joseph — sold into slavery and cast into prison; Israel wandering in the wilderness and later being carried into exile; Paul in prison; Job losing everything. The Bible has many examples of prison and extreme hardship being part of Your story of redemption for the world. Why do I think I deserve any better?

The truth is, anything I receive from You that is better than death is grace.

“For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.” —Romans 6:23

So in effect, prison is grace.

If prison is to be my next home, I will go to prison and serve You with all that I am. And I will continue to be grateful for life, family, friends, and salvation.

Family

I pray for reconciliation.

I pray that Cathy’s heart and spirit will find healing from the damage that I have done — the neglect, temper, selfishness, deception, distraction, and the multitude of other mistakes, poor choices, and sins that I exposed her to. I pray also that You would heal all the brokenness that has occurred at the hands of others.

May she lead her family, employees, friends, and acquaintances in wisdom and strength that can only flow from intimate fellowship with You. I pray that she find her strength, provision, rest, healing, and life in You. And may she find a relationship that is fulfilling, rewarding, and that ultimately honors and serves You.

Father, I pray that the fulfilling relationship she finds is with me.

Again, I pray for myself — that You would change me. Break me. Prepare me. Make me into the man who will walk with her and lead her along the path that You have chosen for us.

I pray that we will re-marry and enjoy a marriage that serves You and brings You glory. But if not me, then I pray You prepare me for that result as well.

I pray for my children — that You would heal what brokenness I’ve exposed them to. I know I didn’t lead them as I should have, and I trust You to bridge the gaps that I left. May each of them grow to know You, to love You, and to serve You.

And I pray for restoration of my relationship with my children. I don’t want anything to return to the way it used to be. The way it used to be is what led me down the path that brought me here. I pray for relationships that honor You first. New relationships that we all will find rewarding and satisfying.

May my restored family live and function to honor You.

Life

Father, I pray that You prepare me for, and lead me to:

• A church that exalts You.
• A ministry that loves Your children and points them to You.
• A home that provides a place to recover and prepare.
• A job where I can make a difference.
• Friends who serve and encourage each other.
• A future where You are sought above all else.

In all these things, I acknowledge that I am looking through a mirror dimly. I only know what I know. I trust Your wisdom to lead me.

I make this prayer out of obedience to Your instruction in Philippians 4:6. But at the same time, I pray that where my desire conflicts with Your plan, Your plan be accomplished in me.

Now I will wait for the peace of Philippians 4:7.

In other words,

“Not my will, but Yours be done.”